pow1 pow2 pow3 pow6 pow7   pow11 pow13 pow14 pow15 pow16

I apologize for that. Those disturbing images are from “People of Walmart.” For the unfamiliar, it was a fleeting Internet craze like planking, pet shaming, breading, the cinnamon challenge, and cats (lol, jk cats are going nowhere). Despite its fleeting nature, “People of Walmart” was a craze so morbidly fascinating it was burned into my memory. Butt cracks, mystery stains, lack of clothing, and of course, sweatpants nightmares have all been seared onto my brain.

With that background of Internet-induced trauma in mind, it is easy to see why I’d be very wary of the super casual, trendy sweats and sweatshirts we’ve been seeing lately. Karl Lagerfeld said, “Sweatpants are a sign of defeat. You lost control of your life so you bought some sweatpants.” Well Karl, that’s a bit extreme… They looked killer in shows like J Brand and Charlotte Ronson, and celebs like Rihanna, Miley and Rita Ora look great in them. They prove it’s a thin and perilous line between sporty chic and the just-rolled-out-of bed-in-the-insane-asylum-look. But don’t sweat it (get it?). Here are your guidelines for staying on trend without looking like you could be featured on “People of Walmart.”

  • Don’t wear sweatpants and a sweatshirt together! C’mon, that’s the easiest way to show you actually couldn’t care less. Instead, balance the volume of sweats or joggers with a tight fitting crop top.
  • Proper fit is essential. Make sure your pants are fitting, not sloppy.  A snug-fitting or cropped sweatshirt like this Dimepiece LA one keeps you out of the lumpy thrift store bin zone.

cropsweatshirt

 

Dimepiece Cropped Hoody

  • Look for pieces in more luxe fabrics or textures like silk or leather.

geosweats

 

Matty Herringbone Texture Printed Pants

  • Taper-legged sweats look soooo cool with a strappy stiletto. Yes, cool enough to warrant those extra o’s.

obeysweats

Keegan Harem Pants

  • Add structured, collared shirts underneath your crew neck sweatshirt for a more polished look.
  • Always accessorize!  A statement necklace looks awesome with a neutral colored sweatshirt. Metallic chain necklaces or fancy earrings bring your look to an appropriate for public level. Accessories let people know you put thought and care into your ensemble.
  • Prints are your friend! Fun prints and designs make your pieces look for thoughtful, intentional, and fashionable.

unifsweatshirt

Ornate 6 Sweatshirt

cheetahsweatshirt

Spotted AOP Crewneck

MF13-083-BLKZOOM1

Floral Crewneck Sweatshirt

medusasweatshirt

Vandal Medusa Crewneck

cheetahsweats

The Lola Sweatpant

flowersweats

Flower Sweatpant

 

Here are some extra highlights for old times’ sake:

pow4

What does the fox say? “Get me the f— out of Walmart.”

pow8

In the context of Walmart, this isn’t nearly as shocking as it should be.

pow9

I’m very sorry for your medical condition but is there any POSSIBLE reason you couldn’t have spared us and worn pants?

pow10

This is actually kind of awesome. I’m jeal.

pow12

This is so disgusting on so many counts. So much is coming to mind that I can’t possibly fathom how she does: typing, general human contact, putting on makeup, fastening buttons, getting eyelashes out of her eyes, petting puppies, nail polish usage, going to the bathroom… EVERYTHING. WHY?!

pow17

When in doubt put on not only every article of clothing you own but everything you own in general.

pow18

 

Mo’ shirt, mo’ problem. This a trend I really hope to see catch on.