We’ve all been through those moments in our life which make us sit in our rooms for a month straight, and shove chocolate croissants and Twinkies in our face. It’s those moments that every girl dreads, and yet is inevitable to escape. You got it ladies – I’m talking about “The Big Break-up.” See, right now I bet you’re beginning to regret all those mushy-gushy journal entries you wrote about how dreamy your ex-is and how funny his jokes are, huh? Never fear! Although those moments are pain-strikingly terrible, I’m going to quote your mother and tell you there’s plenty of fish in the sea. However, if you’re just as impatient as I am and don’t feel like fishing anymore, I’ve got some easy tips on ways to get over this Joe-Shmoe who ripped your heart right out of your rib-cage! Here’s 5 things to do after your big break-up:
1. Delete that chump from your “social circle,” and when I say “social circle” I mean everything your phone can connect to. From Instagram to Facebook, that kid has GOT to go! No one likes a lurker (unless it comes to blogs, then lurk on). If you still know what your ex had for dinner a month after you broke up, then CLEARLY you’re doing it all wrong. CLEARLY.
2. Have a Kelly Clarkson album on constant repeat. I also suggest that you blast every single song as loud as you can…your neighbors should be able to hear it and know you’re newly single. Girl sure knows how to write some pretty decent ex-partner break-up songs.
3. Buy yourself as many dresses as you possibly can. This may sound crazy, but TRUST me – you’ll feel 100% better than you did yesterday. And while I’m bringing up shopping for pretty new dresses, there’s loads of them up on Miss KL! Imagine that.
4. Pick up a weird hobbie your ex told you was strange, but secretly you’ve always had a weird obsession with trying out. Whether it’s knitting or collecting porcelain dolls (ok…weird.), make good use of all this extra time you’ll have on your hands. And if that doesn’t work to your benefit, go hang with your friends you decided to ditch when you were hanging out with what’s-his-name.
5. Realize that you’re better off. Really…you REALLY are better off being single. Think of all those unnecessary moments of irritation, and all that money you spent going on dates (which you shouldn’t even be paying for), you’re most definitely, without a doubt WAAAAAY better being single than having a boyfriend. Now stop drunk dialing him and do something productive.